so
I’ve been working this job for a few months and I’m rly starting to see how artists stop making works once they get jobs. It’s fuckin ass. It’s not even the job itself, but the commute that’s rly the nail in the coffin. I get home, trying to get relief, but there’s a pressure to make my art. The pressure being: when will I make the piece to get me to quit my job?
Realistically for me it’s gonna b a minute. Mostly cuz I rly like getting paid regularly lmao. I can get into a comfy pattern of spending while still being able to work on my pieces and all. While I can’t work on any longer term pieces, the comfort it provides is nice, and being able to yap all day is a blessing.
Itd probably be once a piece sells for double digits, or enough to pay several months of rent/cost of living, then I could rly consider going full time. I am a huuuuge fan of my own security, almost to a detrimental level. It’s not rly a goal I actively have as well tho - recently I’ve been trying to enjoy the craft of it more, but I think I’m more scared of pieces not selling while I’m living a very mobile life.
But until then, I’ll enjoy my lil shenanigans. I try and work a bit in the mornings, a bit when I get home, and however long I can after dinner. If I’m lucky, this can be totaling 3-4 hours. Not as much as I want, and it usually takes me 30 mins to get rly into something. So the work, honestly, is not too fun. I do like the rush, but I don’t like /to/ rush🧍🏻♂️
It’s not nearly as much time as I want, so I try and make things will I can. Predominantly between my emails.
Most of my job is j processing emails - meaning sometimes it’s back to back misery, and other times i could watch whole documentaries without much cognitive thoughts. So I’ve started to bring my sketchbook🤩 and j going nuts on it. I’ve been j doing shading practices honestly - it’s never anything w intention, but more playing w shapes and shadows, folds and curves, depth and spacing. It’s never rly something I’ll plan to sell or recreate. No real message or themes. Just fun little shadings and shapes.
It’s been a minute since I’ve created things w no intention, and it’s kinda eye opening to see that what I’m more naturally drawn to r these formless shapes and folded blobs. They look oddly plush, uncomfortable, deflated, organic, yet spacious. Is it literally me rn like???🤩🤩🤩 na but it is something that has been interesting to see progress. I have fully blown thru my mechanical pencil tho. It all starts with some random scratches and shading patches, before fully fleshing itself out to become what it is.
I wanna see these skills and explorations reflect in my mainline works. Not as much the actually imagery, but the lessons in the sketches. The spacing, the shading, the forms, composition, and focus. The ability to do focus in short bursts. The ability to focus in short bursts.
Alas, I have booked myself up for the upcoming month ahead. So idk when I can work on a mainline piece now. The stopmotions have been plentiful and I’m rly not stopping. Only motioning.
And I picked up supplies for a new medium so 🤪
Alas, the train is getting to my stop so I gotta wrap this up
Much love,
Faraz
Ps uhhhhh
Pss have I talked abt the Sylvia Plath fig tree analogy? Cuz that is still relevant
Psss I’m gonna try fasting for Ramadan this year. So far I have been hungry. It’s partly for Muslim Palestinian Solidarity, and partly to re-understand my family history. But fr I did not ate. Left every crumb alhamdulilah. I’m not religious in any sense currently, but this is something I wanna experience. It’s not as much tough as it is draining. Again, I’m just hungry and thirsty now, but I wanna get my routines going, and hopefully this helps in managing my daily life
Pssss someone teach me how to get a fit off b like pls
uhhhh razdoesart.com
the sketches!!! ❤️🔥